Celebrate the Sadness
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Overtime

3/5/2015

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Two years ago we sat at the Breslin Center at MSU cheering on our Bullock Creek Lady Lancers in the girls basketball state quarterfinals. It was so exciting to be part of this new wonderful community and watch two of the girls from our neighborhood play their hearts out. My belly was starting to get big, we were a few weeks away from learning if our Little Muffin was a boy or girl. I had been feeling him move around, but nothing like I did that night. The noise, vibrations, and excitement made Koen want to dance. I even remarked on Facebook about it. I have proof of his life, a memory he made with our family documented. I remember how much life I felt that night with such great fondness, and tears. My heart aches for all the life that I've lost with him.

Last year this amazing team did it again. They made it all the way to the state semi-final game. I had an even stronger attachment to these girls, after seeing them in the halls and a few special ones in my classroom while teaching at the high school. I was elated for them, and sat on the edge of my lazy boy watching them play online. Last year my boys went to the games at the Breslin without me because I was on bedrest with Tobin. Another year, a different pregnancy.

Last night the Lady Lancers fought hard for a win in districts against a tough team. These girls, they inspire me. They were down, but never gave up the fight. They were victorious by one point in overtime, and that's all it takes, just one point to claim a victory. What a good life lesson! Hackett was sick so we listened to the game at home. As we listened I rocked a crying Tobin who was fighting to stay awake (I'm sure he was anxious about the game).

Kevin and I recounted the last few years after the boys were tucked in bed. Talking about how much we have been through, and overcome. We made it. We fought hard, even when we were losing. We went into overtime. We will always be missing one of our starting five, but our little family claimed a victory when Tobin safely entered this world.

Picture

Two years ago.

Picture

Today.

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    Author

    I am Jackie.
    I am a child of the one true King.
    I am a wife to my high school sweetheart, Kevin. 
    I am a mom to my three sons - Hackett, Koen (my little angel), and Tobin. 
    I am experiencing loss, heartache, and grief.  On May 27, 2013, at 26 weeks and 6 days I went into the hospital with contractions, only to learn that my Koen's sweet little heart had stopped beating.  
    Tobin was born July 8, 2014.
    I am on a journey . . .

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